It's 12:00am
too dark to see past my hands
too cold to move
Since 6 months ago
I've been locked in this tower
with darkness my only company;
I watched as the hours
slowly passed by
Once a few months
my window gets open
And I can see the sun,
feel its rays on my cold dead skin
I'm deficient in vitamin D
Once a month is too little
so I've grown sickly,
deformed by the sun's absence
It's okay though
one day that the window was open
I let a bird slip in
I named him Thoth
He fills the void left by the sun
He gave me strength when I had none
But Thoth is the god of knowledge
something I already have
Ra is the sun god
which is what I truly nee
I see the lust in his eyes,
a whirlwind of locked desire,
looking for a way to be unleashed
There's hidden intentions in all he does
He's always finding an opportunity
for our skins to touch
I want him to cross the line
I want to feel what he feels
I don't want to be forbidden anymore
I want to be his sweet meal
To feel different hands on my body
would awaken what I've been trying to hide
The fact that I want him to take me
I can no longer deny
I wish I could touch his body,
feel him up with my hands;
rub myself against him,
do his every command
Crawling in my skin
inhabits the worms of death
they prance in my flesh
tracing out little tunnels
I pierce the epidermis with a needle
blood gushes out feeding the worms;
the sudden sting left me idle
So I lick the wound delicately
dragging the maggots with my tongue
I bite myself and savor death
now I can continue the cleansing
I pull out the needle from the other side
the string quickly passing through
gathering all impurities along the way
leaving a stitch at the end
I repeat this process
...over and over again
stitch by aching stitch
I must be all prettied up by midnight
have to please master with my appendages
become his atrocious
Theres nothing else I wanna do but
outstand you with my touch;
under your skin, make it
crawl; Leave you
hot and bothered wanting more
Mark your lips for my taking;
exhaust your endurance till you're shaking
Know this:
it is you that makes me lose control;
savor my desire in each kiss
see how much I long for you
Make me yours
engulf my body till it's sore
Feel my chest pressed against your skin
unveil all my temptations and all my
cravings; For you I'd get on my
kness and make you feel ecstasy
My sweet master
entice me with your laughter
I'm waiting for you, my love
waiting peacefully in the dark
shadows bathing my skin
concealing all the sins
I'm waiting for you, my love
in this wooden rocking chair
rocking myself back and forth
drowning the sounds of despair
I'm waiting for you, my love
and I've lost track of time
can't remember when you were mine;
This seems endless
I'm so tired of being here...
You lied to me didn't you?
You're never coming back,
it's just as I feared
You ask me what I do now that I'm alone
You tell me not to worry, "Daddy's coming home"
You feed me hope every night
saying everything will be alright
when you know how much it breaks me
that I can't ca
The Antidote Wore Off by UrDeadlyDesire, literature
Literature
The Antidote Wore Off
Your touch used to give me life
it used to hold me together
it once made me immune
to the violent venom
Now you fill my heart with poison
you stain my memories with pain
you dig you fingers in my wounds
you made me forget my name
In my veins my blood is clotting
because of you my heart is rotting
and it can't regenerate back to health
because the antidote has been stealthed
So hear me out when I say
I wish you'd simple stay away
Now that the antidote wore off
there's nothing I can do, to make it stop
I wish you were still my shield
and could protect me from this corruption
but that's not how you feel
you only want my destruction...
I'm sorry for my absence
I'm sorry for the emptiness I made you feel
I'm sorry for all the pain I put you through
I'm sorry for making your nightmares real
I'm sorry for the tears I'm shedding as I write this
they don't compare to the thousands you cried
I'm sorry I turned our relationship
into one sick lullaby
I'm sorry I didn't notice how much you loved me
I was too distant in our affair
I'm sorry I never showed you
just how much I really cared
I'm sorry for this and many things more
I'm sorry for everything, that your heart, it tore
I never meant to do these things to you
you who loved me unconditionally
you who were with me daily;
I'm
Everyone on Earth died...
all my friends and family...gone
Well, I never cared for family
let’s just say my loved ones
When everyone died,
Earth turned black & white
I’m living every day in gray tones
it reminds me of the falling ashes
when I visited their tombstones
I finally got what I wanted
silence
It feels so absolute now
that I don’t know what to do with it
The eerie absence of voices
carves fear in my heart
I miss everyone…
I’m all alone…
why did they have to die?
...why did I survive!?
It should’ve been me...
it should’ve been me...
Through Her Distant Eyes by UrDeadlyDesire, literature
Literature
Through Her Distant Eyes
Crawling beneath the surface of my eye
there is a damaged fruit fly;
It’s become as anxious as I,
trying to burst through the sides
I dig my nails in trying to dig it out
only to feel the eggs it’s laid there
Panic takes a hold of me
I don’t know what to do,
should I scream till I can’t no more
or wait till my eye is consumed
I’m paralyzed in place
lost in time
My eyes no longer mirror my soul
now they are distant
locking many mysteries untold
on these void eyes
Metamorphose Of The Swarm by UrDeadlyDesire, literature
Literature
Metamorphose Of The Swarm
Each day that slowly ticks away
I'm progressing, I'm transforming
Every cell in my body shifts and twist
sending pulsations of agony in each turn;
I begin to wonder how much I can resist
before I give myself to the unknown
Someone pour a chemical in my pod,
this is what I believe makes me react
A mysterious catalyst,
to whom my cells have become its host
The abduction of reason has become severe;
I can no longer trust my instincts
I'm becoming feral
I'm becoming-
I've turned savage...
The chemical courses through my veins
awakening the dormant swarm;
what once made my blood stained
now fuels the horde
My vectors reach out towards the en